According to the Manosphere, most women want a hulking He-man as the object of their affections, rather than an essentially normal man.
The idea is that they say they want a normal, responsible man. But in reality they are bursting at the seams, on the inside, for Conan the Barbarian to unleash them from their civilized behavior.
This is wrong.
There are some indecent, absurd women who want nothing more than a barbarian to have wild fits of passion with. But they aren’t large in number.
The most notable error of the Manosphere – and it is an error repeated literally everywhere in modern society today – is to take a single rule and apply it to all members of a particular group.
The fact is this: there are women who want He-man. But there are also women who like spindly rock stars who look like they’re on starvation diets. How does this fit into the Manosphere’s conception of the female mind?
The fact is, the Manosphere is just another ideological group with its One Big Idea that explains all of a particular section of life.
In this case, it’s supposed to explain male-female relations.
The basis of their philosophy is strength. The idea is that, evolutionarily speaking, the strongest survive. Thus women are supposed to want the strongest men in order to protect them, this being a holdover from the days when men are supposed to have wrestled with dinosaurs.
On the flip side of this evolutionary tale, men are supposed to want women with great looking bodies because they are supposed to be the best candidates for reproduction.
This all falls flat, however, in the face of experience.
The fact is, most everyone wants a spouse who looks great. But almost all of us value certain qualities more than appearance.
I, for example, wouldn’t mind marrying a model. But there are qualities that I will not sacrifice just for the sake of looks.
The same is true of women. Most women would like a strong, powerful man. But at bottom, this isn’t important to most women.
It’s like buying a car: you’d like an attractive one: but the most important, non-negotiable point is that it runs.
We’ve all seen mediocre looking couples who have lived very happy lives together. This is because looks were something likeable, but not important.
The Manosphere, like all groups and individuals promising dating advice, have merely cornered one section of the dating market. Having done so, they then treat that one, small section of the market as if it’s the entire market.
This is false.
There are many different kinds of people in the world, all wanting different things. Not to be trite, but there really is a woman out there for every man, because there are parallel sections of desires on both sides of the human race. Put another way, there are males and females who both want the same thing.
Thus the He-man routine of some men will work with a certain kind of cheap woman.
So to, the stable, normal life of the normal man will find its parallel in a certain kind of woman.
The mistake of the Manosphere is the mistake of all ideologues: they try to fit the entire panoply of human relational goals into one tiny box.